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Adoption Blog by Friends in Adoption: Articles, News & Events

AmazonSmile Brings a SMILE to FIA!

On #GivingTuesday, please make a donation to Friends in Adoption, or sign up with AmazonSmile & Amazon will donate 0.5% of the price of your eligible purchases to Friends In Adoption whenever you shop on AmazonSmile!… Read More

Happy Thanksgiving from everyone at Friends In Adoption!

Happy Thanksgiving from everyone at Friends In Adoption!… Read More

November 22nd is National Adoption Day

Friends In Adoption celebrates National Adoption Day on November 22nd!… Read More

DailyMail.com article featuring Friends In Adoption alumni family

An article from DailyMail.com about a Friends In Adoption family. Dad donates part of his liver to his adopted daughter to save her life.… Read More

A Note on What it means to be Inclusive and the Importance of Diversity:

A Note on What it means to be Inclusive and the Importance of Diversity: As an agency, Friends in Adoption has always welcomed and honored all families and individuals.… Read More

November is National Adoption Awareness Month. FIA leads the way in Compassionate Adoption

November is National Adoption Awareness Month. Friends In Adoption continues it’s commitment to compassionate adoption.… Read More

Learn How to Adopt a Child at FIA’s GAW – Get Acquainted Workshop – December 6–7 ~ Register Today!

Friends in Adoption (FIA) will be in Saratoga Springs, NY for the next Get Acquainted Workshop beginning on Wednesday evening, December 6th and continuing Thursday 9am-5pm, December 7th, 2017 at The Inn at Saratoga 231 Broadway, Saratoga Springs, NY. Register now and join us to learn about adoption!… Read More

November is National Adoption Awareness Month!

Celebrating National Adoption Awareness Month – November is here and Friends in Adoption (FIA) joins the nation in celebrating National Adoption Awareness Month (although we naturally celebrate Adoption every day of the year!).… Read More

Learn about Adopting a Child & the Adoption Process – Free Info Session on 10/13/17 in Vermont

Friends in Adoption (FIA), is holding a free informational meeting about adoption on 10/13/17 at University of Vermont Medical Center, Burlington, VT. Register today!

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What do I tell my child about their birth mother?

A family shares its story of their journey in their adoption circle.… Read More

Friends In Adoption Provincetown Family Week Gathering! August 2, 2017

Friends In Adoption invites you to a picnic at Herring Cove Beach August 2nd, 2017 During Provincetown Family Week… Read More

Click here to upload YOUR Picnic Photos!

You are invited to FIA’s 35th Annual Picnic! Saturday, July 15th rain or shine! Lake St. Catherine State Park, Poultney, Vermont… Read More

Frequently Asked Questions by Pregnant Women to Friends In Adoption

Considering adoption for your child? The staff at FIA is here to answer your questions and guide you through your options. Call 1-800-982-3678 anytime.… Read More

A Summer Letter From Dawn

FIA’S 35TH ANNUAL PICNIC — A JOYFUL DAY OF CELEBRATION We now have 3 generations of FIA families in attendance at the picnic. Children that were placed through FIA bring their partners and children along with their birth and adoptive families; young adults placed attend on their own just to stay connected; reunions happen at the picnic- truly a day … Read More

Happy Fourth of July ~ July 4, 2017

Happy Fourth of July – July 4, 2017 from Friends In Adoption… Read More

In Celebration of All The Fathers!

In celebration of all the Dads, Happy Father’s Day from Friends In Adoption!… Read More

Interested in Adoption? Register for the 2017 APC Adoption Conference, November 19th

Come to the Adoptive Parents Committee’s 37th annual APC Adoption Conference, November 19th, 2017 in Brooklyn, NY.… Read More

Happy Mother’s Day ~ May 14, 2017

Happy Mother’s Day – May 14, 2017 from Friends In Adoption… Read More

In Honor of Birth Mother’s Day ~ 2017

Birth Mother’s Day is just around the corner – May 13th, 2017! In honor of Birth Mother’s Day, FIA is sharing a story from one of our many special families. “We are Kathy and Dave (not pictured), we adopted Lucy 5 years ago. We have a very open adoption with her birth mother and her family. We could not be … Read More

For Birth Mother’s Day ~ May 13, 2017

Friends in Adoption celebrates Birth Mother’s Day – May 13, 2017… Read More

A Second Chance at Life

A birth mom describes her adoption journey and the friendship she developed through her open adoption.
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Darcy’s Story

Darcy is a 4 year old wonderful girl. Meet her adoptive parents, and her birth mom, in a loving open adoption story.… Read More

Video: Collin’s Story

Collin, a senior in High School, shares his experiences growing up as child who was adopted through open adoption.… Read More

What A Difference A Year Makes!

An FIA family’s journey to happiness by overcoming obstacles and keeping their faith.… Read More

Video: Matt and Renee — We are ready to adopt a child!

Our names are Matt and Renee and we live in New York City. We are a thoughtful, fun and lively couple and we are so excited to create a family through adoption!… Read More

Happy Valentine’s Day from Friends in Adoption!

Friends in Adoption sends thoughts of love to all in our FIA circle and to all the people of the world.… Read More

Friends in Adoption stands with Planned Parenthood!

Friends In Adoption stands firmly with PLANNED PARENTHOOD and a woman’s right to privacy, access to healthcare and reproductive choice.… Read More

FIA stands in support of our LGBTQ+ community!

Friends In Adoption is proud to continue its good work in open adoption for all families and advocating for adoption rights for the LGBTQ+ community.… Read More

Our Adoption Story – Mary – an article from Journeys, 2006

Here is the story of Bob, Teri, Jeremy and Mary and how our family was created through open adoption. … Read More

A new edition of Connections is out!

The Fall/2016 edition of Connections, Friends in Adoption’s newsletter, is now available for download. Enjoy learning about baby Eli’s adoption story, Dawn’s Desk, A story by birth mother Katy, and many wonderful photos and letters from FIA families. Spreading the joy of the gift of adoption!… Read More

An Inside View on Open-Adoption

Matthew, an FIA (Friends in Adoption) spokesperson for the APC Conference and now, a college applicant, shares his college essay with our FIA community. Below he describes his open-adoption experiences through the years, discarding many adoption taboos along the way.… Read More

Happy New Year!

Happy New Year from Friends in Adoption! … Read More

Happy Hanukkah!

Happy Hanukkah to all our friends and families who celebrate the festival of lights!… Read More

Merry Christmas!

At Friends in Adoption, we hope the spirit of the season will bring peace and joy to all!… Read More

Happy Kwanzaa!

FIA wishes peace and joy to all our FIA families celebrating Kwanzaa!… Read More

Adoption Awareness by Sandra Schlosser

Sandra Schlosser, an FIA outreach coordinator, who also provides support services to pregnant women/expectant couples, wrote the following article for the Rutland Herald newspaper.… Read More

November 19th is National Adoption Day

Friends in Adoption focuses on “compassionate adoption” in which everyone’s needs are met.

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Thinking about adoption? Register for the 2016 APC Adoption Conference

One of the biggest and most helpful adoption education events of the year is coming up on Sunday, November 20, 2016 from 8 a.m. – 5 p.m. at St. Francis College in Brooklyn, NY. The Adoptive Parents Committee, Inc. (APC) is proud to announce its 36th Annual APC Adoption Conference. … Read More

Happy Thanksgiving from Friends in Adoption!

Friends in Adoption (FIA) is a non-profit, pro-choice, licensed agency with a focus on helping people make informed decisions concerning adoption. … Read More

Our future needs us

To All of our LGBTQ+ Families and to the LGBTQ families throughout the country, My heart breaks for our children. As parents we must remain strong and united. We must show our children through action that we will fight for their rights. We will show them by example how to live life in kindness and respect. (read more)… Read More

FIA leads the way in education about adoption!

Students from the local high school had a great opportunity to learn and ask questions about the adoption process thanks to Friends in Adoption.… Read More

Adoption for prospective minorities and LGBTQ families

Friends in Adoption is a pioneer in providing adoption support to all families. FIA reaches out to minority and LGBTQ communities to better inform and cultivate interest in adoption, however many questions arise regarding visible adoptions.… Read More

Annual Giving More Through Adoption Birth Mother Retreat

Each birth mother is as unique as the circumstances leading to that woman’s choice to place her child for adoption. One common thread for birth/first mothers is that adoption is a life-long decision. Life post-adoption is a journey, often with ups and downs, and support along that journey is very helpful. Many women find support in birth mother support groups, and FIA is pleased to spread the word about an upcoming birth mother retreat on November 11-12, 2016, in Clifton Park, NY!… Read More

The Adoption Process from the Expectant Mother’s Perspective

What is it really like to decide on adoption, look through parent profiles to choose a family, and place your child in their arms—and how can the adoption process better serve these women? Article – by Barbara Herel This piece has valuable insights from both Dawn Smith-Pliner and the birthmothers. I often think back to my domestic adoption process as … Read More

“Circle of Love”: A Friends In Adoption Support Group for Birth Parents

Circle of Love is an FIA support group open to all birthmothers, birthfathers and/or pregnant women who are considering an adoption plan. These monthly meetings are free and confidential.
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Honoring all Fathers

Friends in Adoption honors all fathers – birth, adoptive, and future dads – on this special day. Thank you to all the devoted, caring, loving, supportive, nurturing fathers, whether birth or adoptive. You are special! Friends in Adoption celebrates you!… Read More

June is LGBTQ Pride Month — Visit FIA at Upcoming Pride Events!

Come stop by and say Hi to FIA as we celebrate our LGBTQ families at upcoming Pride events in NJ, Brooklyn, and Philadephia! March with us as we celebrate our LGBTQ families at the New York City Pride Parade on Sunday, June 26! To register email: jen@friendsinadoption.org… Read More

Happy Mother’s Day, from Friends in Adoption

Happy Mother’s Day from the staff at Friends in Adoption… Read More

Reflections and Gratitude for Birth Mother’s Day

Saturday, May 7th, is Birth Mother’s Day. This special holiday honors women who have placed children for adoption to be raised by adoptive parents. … Read More

Birth Mother’s Day Celebration on May 7th, 2016

Saturday, May 7th is Birth Mother’s Day. Circle of Love, an adoption support group for birth parents, would like to celebrate and honor the amazing women that birth mothers are. Please join us for a catered lunch and great conversation on Saturday, May 7th at 11:30am in Clifton Park, NY.… Read More

Friends in Adoption Commemorates Martin Luther King Jr. Day

Friends in Adoption recognizes the important work of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr and honors this day with well wishes for peace and harmony worldwide.… Read More

Merry Christmas!

Hello Friends ~ FIA received a Holiday card this year that summed up everything we hoped to say in our annual holiday note. To All  ~ “Let there be LAUGHTER JOY SMILES PEACE HOPE ~wishing you happiness that never ends.” We wish to have all experience LAUGHTER, JOY, AND SMILIES in your life’s.   To our  waiting families, it is our … Read More

National Adoption Month – featuring FIA family Peter, Chris and Darcy

“We are so thankful for the support we have received from FIA and from all the doctors, nurses, and medical staff we have gotten to know; for the connection that we still have with Darcy’s birth mother; and for our incredible families and friends, who have cheered us up and cheered us on.”… Read More

Help FIA Advocate for a Permanent & Refundable Adoption Tax Credit

Let’s help U.S. Representative Danny Davis and U.S. Representative Diane Black to spread the word that adoption is an important family building option and should be available to everyone. Join the #ATCStorm at 4PM tomorrow. #PassHR2434 #PassS950… Read More

FIA Night at the Albany Devils’ Hockey Game – Sunday 11/01/15

Please come join Friends in Adoption (FIA) family and friends to celebrate National Adoption Month and a great Albany Devils’ hockey game vs. the Toronto Marlies on Sunday, November 1, 2015 at 3pm. This Adoption and Foster Families Group Outing event is both a great networking and post-adoption opportunity to celebrate positive adoption connections. … Read More

Resilience in Adoption

The words resilience and adoption go hand in hand. Each person in the adoption circle: birth parent, adoptive parent, and child, need resilience because adoption by its nature involves the experience of profound loss. Resilience also allows people to experience healing and profound peace, joy and love.… Read More

Photos from FIA’s Annual Picnic – 2015

Photos from the FIA (Friends in Adoption) Annual Picnic on July 18, 2015.… Read More

Love wins!

Friends in Adoption is thrilled with today’s SCOTUS decision on Marriage equality. We congratulate all of our gay, lesbian, transgender and ALL TYPES of families in this very important, historic victory today! Love wins, all families win, all children win!… Read More

When is adoption “done right?”

When is adoption “done right?” Sometimes it is easier to think about the ways something can be “done wrong” in order to be sure we get it right. Any time adoption is not informed by respect and truth, or when it is not voluntary for a placing parent, it is done wrong. Any time adoption moves forward without regard for the (…)… Read More

Thank you Senator Gillibrand for “Every Child Deserves a Family”

LGBTQ & Adoption: “Every Child Deserves a Family” — New York Senator Kirsten Gillibrand has introduced federal legislation that would ensure that LGBTQ individuals and couples have the same adoption rights as heterosexual individuals and couples do. In the news, two Friends in Adoption (FIA) families were recently featured in stories related to this proposed law. … Read More

Open Adoption in the 21st Century

Open Adoption Presentation: AAAA Conference Presentation: “Open Adoption in the 21st Century (PDF Download )… Read More

PACA: The Role of the Post Adoption Contact Agreement in Open Adoptions

PACA: The Role of the Post Adoption Contact Agreement in Open Adoptions. (PDF file for download)… Read More

Introducing: National Pro-Choice Adoption Collaborative (NPAC)

Friends in Adoption (FIA) and Open Adoption & Family Services (OA&FS), two non-profit, high-integrity, national agencies, with over three decades of expertise in providing open adoption services, have formed the National Pro-choice Adoption Collaborative. We want to partner with you!… Read More

FAQ: Can I Adopt a Child If I Have a Health Condition?

Q: Can I Adopt a Child If I Have a Health Condition? A: Friends in Adoption is occasionally asked by a prospective adoptive parent if they would be disqualified from adopting a child because of a health condition, either past or present. Like a prospective biological parent, having a health condition does not automatically disqualify a prospective adoptive parent from being…… Read More

Happy Chanukah!

Happy Chanukah to all of our friends, families, and prospective adoptive families who celebrate the beautiful Festival of Lights! As you light each Hanukkah candle, may it shed a lovely ray of light and hope and promise on you and yours today…. From all of us at Friends in Adoption.

November 22 is National Adoption Day

Friends in Adoption Commemorates National Adoption Day.… Read More

Kayla’s Story: A Voice of Adoption in Celebration of National Adoption Month

In celebration of November, National Adoption Month, Friends in Adoption (FIA) is featuring a special perspective. Read Kayla’s Story, here.… Read More

Adoption Books For Children

Friends in Adoption is frequently asked about adoption book recommendations for children. We are happy to share a partial list of some of our favorites with you!… Read More

Adoption Quote by Isabella Rossellini

Isabella Rossellini: “Adoption has the dimension of connection—not only to your own tribe, but beyond, widening the scope of what constitutes love, ties and family. Click to read more…… Read More

Adoption Quote Jim Gritter

“We should not be asking who this child belongs to, but who belongs to this child.” – Jim Gritter… Read More

Quote for Waiting Adoptive Parents

“Everywhere in nature we are taught the lessons of patience and waiting. We want things a long time before we get them, and the fact that we want them a long time makes them all the more precious when they come.” — Joseph F. Smith… Read More

Are you Hoping to become a Parent Through Adoption?

The American Academy of Adoption Attorneys is offering a free and open to the public Family Building Expo. Stop by the Friends in Adoption table and say hello to Dawn and Nan! “Creating Your Child’s Story” Saturday, September 20, 2014, 9:30 a.m. to 2:30 p.m. Four Seasons Hotel, One Logan Square, Philadelphia Workshops by the leading national legal experts about … Read More

Welcome Home Aria!!

Joe, Graham and Emily welcome home: Aria!

Congratulations on your Finalization Day! — Aug 2014Read More

Adoption Information in Any Language

Each year, FIA is asked by health care professionals and other advocates if we can assist a woman or couple with an adoption plan if they do not speak English. The answer is and has been, YES!  Women’s issues are women’s issues, regardless of spoken language, and compassionate adoption is not limited only to those who speak English. Women and couples for whom English is not their first language may be considering adoption as an option for an unplanned pregnancy. Friends in Adoption is happy to work with anyone interested in learning more about adoption regardless of communication style or language.… Read More

Photo Album: Friends in Adoption 32nd Annual Picnic – 2014

The Friends in Adoption 32nd Annual Picnic was perfect! Perfect weather, perfect fun, perfect energy and perfect spirit of family. This photo album is just a small sample of all the fun. We hope to see everyone again, soon! If you took your own photos at the picnic, please like, share, and post your photos under the hashtag #fiapicnic2014 so we can find … Read More

Adoption is Another Word for Love

“Adoption is another word for Love!” Another one of our favorite adoption quotes.

Testimonial by Stacy, Brendan and Aidan

“Thank you Friends in Adoption (FIA) for all of your help and support! We are so thankful for Aidan! He brings so much joy to our lives. We also feel very lucky to have such a special relationship with both of Aidan’s birth parents.”

Sincerely,
Stacy and BrendanRead More

Five Reasons Why We Chose Open Adoption
  • When she looks in the mirror, we want our daughter to know herself. It’s hard to face the world when you don’t know where your face came from.
  • We didn’t want our daughter to have the cabbage patch mentality. The truth is, her life didn’t start the day we adopted …

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2014 AAAA Conference Photos

Dawn and Nan recently attended the American Academy of Adoption Attorneys (AAAA) Conference in New Orleans and networked with adoption attorneys and professionals all over the country. FIA appreciates working with many of our AAAA friends!… Read More

Robert Klose Adoption Quote

I realized at the start that whether a child is biological or adopted, one does not know all the ingredients in the package. That is what growth is all about. A child is the slowest flower in the world, opening petal by petal, revealing the developing personality within. -Robert Klose, Adoptive parent

One Final Call to Action – Save the Adoption Tax Credit!

Thank you to all who have participated in the Grassroots Advocacy Campaign to Save the Adoption Tax Credit! One final call to action! In this last week of our grassroots campaign, please check congress.gov and see which Members of Congress have become cosponsors of S.1056 and H.R.2144. This is a chance to thank those representatives who are supporting the bill! … Read More

Saving the Adoption Tax Credit!

Let’s Keep It Going! When something is worth pursuing, even when it is a challenge, it is important that we don’t give up! Every day, hundreds of people reach out to their representatives in Congress about a whole host of issues. Sometimes it takes more than one try to get their attention, so please continue to bring to light the important … Read More

We Look at Adoption as a Very Sacred Exchange

“We look at adoption as a very sacred exchange. It was not done lightly on either side. I would dedicate my life to this child.” – Jamie Lee Curtis, Adoptive mother

The Latest on Advocating for the Adoption Tax Credit (ATC)

Did you know?  Members of Congress working on tax reform have said that for any element of the current tax code to remain, it should do one or all of the following:  1) grow the economy, 2) make the tax code fairer, and, 3) effectively promote an important policy objective. And guess what? A refundable adoption tax credit does all … Read More

Adopted Boy: They are Both my Real Parents!

“One day while I was hanging out with one of my friends the topic of our parents came up. My friend always knew that I was adopted through open adoption… Then he asked me, between my adoptive parents and my birthparents which did I feel were my “REAL” parents? … “Read More

Language in Adoption: What’s in a name?

Language in Adoption: What’s in a name? by Dawn Smith Pliner, Founding Director, Friends in Adoption Birthmom? First mom? Natural mom? Does that make me an Adoptive mom? A Second mom? Or an Unnatural mom? Language is powerful — it can be helpful and it can be hurtful. Many years ago I called a pregnant woman who was considering adoption a … Read More

A New Friend

Nan and I recently had the honor of meeting Meg, the Founder and Executive Director of Plants for Patients. I knew our organizations were soul mates when I read from their website this paragraph: “Plants for Patients is an idea; it’s a framework for doing good work in our communities. The program identifies as neither pro-choice nor anti-abortion, but exists in the space between, a space we call pro-compassion. This framework allows us to warmly welcome people of differing views, beliefs and opinions to support women in need.” … Read More

Can I still Adopt if I have an Illness?

Friends in Adoption (FIA) founding director Dawn Smith Pliner recently wrote this post for the American Fertility Association (AFA) Blog on the topic of whether or not illness will stop prospective adoptive parents from adopting, in light of recent events on the popular television program, The Little Couple.… Read More

Susan Ito – Adopted Child – Adoption Quote

“There is no doubt in my mind that being adopted affects parenting in a profound way. But how it manifests itself is an idiosyncratic as each parent, as unique as each child…”… Read More

Your Adoption Tax Credit Advocacy is WORKING!!

Please keep it up and if you haven’t helped out yet, please do! The time to make a few calls is now. It won’t take much time but those calls have a great effect. Members of Congress act on issues when they believe those issues matter to their constituents. Now that the adoption tax credit is under threat, your three … Read More

Adoption Quote – Amanda Bearse

“If a child is born and raised in a home that is loving and nurturing, where there is complete truth about who we are, you can’t give a child any greater place from which to fly.”

– Amanda Bearse, adoptive parent… Read More

From Hollywood to Downton Abbey… Adoption on the Screen

Modern-FamilyFor as long as it took adoption to change over the past hundred years, it has taken popular media even longer to catch on to accurate depictions of adoption in film and television. Until the television show Modern Family came out with Cam and Mitchell adopting internationally and then going through the process to adopt domestically, there was virtually no real currency regarding the issues around adoption on television.… Read More

Please Help FIA advocate for the Adoption Tax Credit!

The Issue: Last week, the Chairman of the Ways and Means Committee released his tax reform proposal and to our dismay, the proposal eliminates the adoption tax credit. Our grassroots advocacy efforts are needed now more than ever before. Please help us reach every single member of Congress by sharing your real stories!  Outreach to your legislators is the only … Read More

Please HELP Make Adoption Tax Credit Permanent!

Friends in Adoption (FIA) is a member organization of The Adoption Tax Credit Working Group. We are helping to spread the word about the need for continued advocacy for a PERMANENT, REFUNDABLE adoption tax credit through a Grassroots Advocacy Campaign. Please help! The Goal? The Adoption Tax Credit Working Group (ATCWG) would like to obtain 30 Co-Sponsors on the Adoption … Read More

FAQ: How do I give my baby up for adoption?

Q: How do I give up my baby for adoption?” A: When an expectant mother is considering adoption for her baby, it is much more than just “giving a baby up for adoption”. It means making an adoption plan for her child, and it means a lot of courage and incredible sacrifice on her part. She knows she is… Read More

Press Release: “FIA receives HRC’s All Children – All Families Seal of Recognition”

Friends in Adoption (FIA), a licensed, non-profit adoption agency, recently received the Human Rights Campaign Foundation’s All Children – All Families Seal of Recognition as a 2014 Leader in Supporting and Serving LGBT Families. Since its inception in 1982, FIA was one of the pioneer agencies in welcoming all families to adoption and from its early years has promoted adoption by qualified adoptive parents regardless of their sexual orientation. Upon learning about the Human Rights Campaign Foundation (HRC) All Children – All Families cultural competency certification, FIA enthusiastically signed on to participate.… Read More

FIA Needs Your Photos for the FIA: Keep It Real Project

FIA Introduces…

The Keep it Real Project: Real Adoptions. Real People. Real Images.

Calling All FIA Family Members!

FIA loves featuring photos of REAL FIA ALUMNI. Portraying actual FIA family members (birth and adoptive) in our print and electronic publications, as opposed to using stock photos, are the only way to keep it real! If you and/or your family members are interested in being a part of this exciting project, please click on the link below and from there you will be able to send us your best 1-3 family photos…… Read More

Share the Love

Friends in Adoption Announces the 1st Annual SHARE THE LOVE Campaign **UPDATE Feb 14, 2014** A big Valentine’s Day hug to all those that have contributed to the 1st Annual FIA Share the Love Campaign. The FIA family continues to grow with the addition of four new families created so far in 2014! A raffle winner drawn from participants will … Read More

Considering Adopting a Child after Infertility?

Phyllis Lowinger, LCSW, will be offering a six week discussion group in the New York City area on “The Journey from Infertility to Alternative Family Building Options: Adoptions and Third Party Reproduction.”

Date: Tuesday, February 5, 2014
Time: 7 – 8:30 p.m.… Read More

Quote from Martin Luther King, Jr.

“I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character.” – Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.… Read More

Holiday Wishes from the FIA Staff!

From all of us at Friends in Adoption

Gentle arms around our families – birth and adoptive
Extra hugs to our children
Peace and Kindness to All

Joyful Holiday and New Year
– The Friends in Adoption Staff

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Poem – Legacy of an Adopted Child

Adopted Children Are Product Of Two Different Kinds Of Love By Abigail Van Buren | Dear Abby – Wed, Mar 6, 2013 DEAR ABBY: While cleaning out my attic yesterday, I found a letter that my daughter wrote to you a few years ago when she was 13. She was responding to a poem that had appeared in your column, “Legacy of … Read More

Friends in Adoption is an Ally for Adoption!

Friends in Adoption (FIA) is an Ally for Adoption, and we welcome you to become one too! If you believe, as we do, that “EVERY CHILD IN AMERICA DESERVES THE CHANCE TO FIND A FOREVER FAMILY,” please read on.… Read More

Consider a Donation to Friends in Adoption

As you plan for your year-end contributions, please consider donating to Friends in Adoption (FIA) to help us continue our lifelong work supporting the family of adoption, and for continuing to serve as a community resource for adoption advocacy and education. Your generous financial support, along with your voices, greatly help advance this important work and are appreciated! FIA is a not-for-profit agency. We rely in part on the generous gifts of our alumni, supporters, and friends. All contributions are tax-deductible. FIA is doing more now than ever before to create and care for families created through Compassionate Adoption. Thank you, in advance, for your generosity!… Read More

FIA and HRC: All Children – All Families

Friends in Adoption (FIA) was one of the pioneer agencies in welcoming all families to the family of adoption and from its early years has promoted adoption by lesbian and gay parents. Upon learning about the Human Rights Coalition (HRC) All Children – All Families cultural competency certification, FIA enthusiastically signed on to participate. HRC’s All Children – All Families … Read More

Family Circus Adoption Cartoon

One of our favorite cartoons, found on the internet. It has such a simple, yet beautiful message.

Press Release: “FIA defends reproductive rights and highlights best practice to celebrate National Adoption Awareness Month”

Friends in Adoption, licensed non-profit agency, defends reproductive rights and highlights best practice to celebrate November — National Adoption Awareness Month. FIA believes it is important for women and couples facing a pregnancy decision to learn about all their legal options – knowing that they may be considering parenting, adoption, or abortion – and its ethical approach is to listen and provide information and support to those individuals, without telling them which decision they should make.… Read More

Exciting News – We’ve Moved!

EXCITING NEWS It’s official ~ FIA’s main office is now located in Poultney, Vermont. Our new mailing address: PO Box 238 Poultney, Vermont 05764 Our telephone and fax numbers remain the same. Call 1-800-98-ADOPT (1-800-982-3678) to reach us. ~ Poultney gives a warm welcome to Friends in Adoption (FIA). Surrounded by an alternative high school across the street, a college … Read More

FAQ: What is FIA’s approach to adoption?

Q: What is FIA’s approach to adoption? A: FIA believes and practices compassionate adoption, meeting the unique needs of EVERYONE involved in the process. FIA views adoption as a TEAM effort with all parties working towards the common goal of doing what is best for the child… Read More

FAQ: I don’t know anything about open adoption. Can you tell me about it?

Q: I don’t know anything about open adoption. Can you tell me about it? A: Open adoption enables communication between expectant/birth parents and adoptive birth parents before and/or after placement of a child with the adoptive family. Open adoption may include sharing information, letters, emails, calls, texts, and or face-to face visits…… Read More

What’s the difference between open adoption and closed adoption?

Q: What’s the difference between Open Adoption and Closed Adoption? A: Open Adoption vs Closed Adoption means, among many other factors, that there are different levels of post-adoption contact. In open adoption, there is an ongoing direct relationship between the child and the birth family…… Read More

FAQ: Is FIA a licensed and not-for-profit adoption agency?

Q: Is FIA a licensed and not-for-profit adoption agency? A: Yes, FIA is a not-for-profit adoption agency licensed in Vermont and Rhode Island; a New York State authorized agency and approved in Connecticut… Read More

FAQ: How old are the children who are placed for adoption?

Q: How old are the children who are placed for adoption? A: FIA is licensed to place children of any age. The majority of placements involve newborns… Read More

FAQ: What states do the children who are placed come from?

Q: What states to the children who are places come from? A: FIA is licensed for domestic adoption. FIA works with expectant mothers/ couples from all over the United States.… Read More

FAQ: What is open adoption and are all adoptions with FIA open?

Q: What is open adoption and are all adoptions with FIA open? A: Open adoption generally means there is an ongoing direct relationship between the child and the birth family. FIA adheres to “Hospitious Adoption”. Jim Gritter, author of Hospitious Adoption takes the approach that practicing goodwill, respect, and courage within the realm of adoption makes the process unfold more smoothly and enriches children’s lives… Read More

FAQ: What is the average cost of an adoption through FIA?

Q: What is the average cost of an adoption through FIA? A: The cost of an adoption averages between $25,000 and $45,000. Costs generally incurred by the adopting couple/single are: agency fee, home study fees, advertising and outreach fees, counseling fees, legal fees, telephone and travel expenses, and in some cases medical expenses… Read More

FAQ: Are all adoptions that FIA handles open adoption?

Q: Are all adoptions that Friends in Adoption (FIA) handles open adoption? A: No, the type of post-adoption contact varies depending on the birth parents and adoptive parents that are involved. For example, if you call our toll-free number and… Read More

FIA Family Explains how DOMA affects their Lives

Winchester, Mass. couple closely watching DOMA ruling News Story originally broadcast by their Local News Station NECN. Click Here to read original story and to watch the video. Joe and Graham are Adoptive Parents (with their daughter Emily) working with Friends in Adoption for their second adoption. …. original story … (NECN) – The Supreme Court ruling on DOMA will … Read More

FAQ: Do you have to be a certain age or religion to adopt through FIA?

Q: Do you have to be a certain age or religion to adopt through FIA? A: No! FIA looks for a serious commitment from the couple/single who wants to adopt. We are proud of the diversity of the adopting families we can present to an expectant mother… Read More

FAQ: How long does an adoption with FIA usually take?

Q: How long does an adoption with FIA usually take? A: The time period until you have a baby in your home averages between 12 – 36 months. This time period is measured from the time your file is complete and you become an active waiting family with FIA… Read More

FAQ: Can adopting parents specify the gender of the child to be adopted?

Q: Can adopting parents specify the gender of the child to be adopted? A: No! Our families often work with a pregnant woman for months, and the pregnant woman becomes very attached to a particular adoptive family . . . … Read More

FAQ: What if we are working with an expectant mother and the baby is born with medical problems?

Q: What if we are working with an expectant mother and the baby is born with medical problems? A: It is important to FIA that each child is adopted by parents who will embrace the baby and the child’s situation completely… Read More

FAQ: I am afraid of being judged . . . if I call your agency, what can I expect?

Q: I am afraid of being judged . . . if I call your agency, what can I expect? A: At FIA, we pledge to not judge you! No matter your circumstance, we are here to listen and not judge. We know it’s hard to talk about personal issues with a stranger, but sometimes it is easier than to talk with people who are trying to influence you to do a certain thing. …… Read More

FAQ: What services do you provide, and how much does it cost?

Q: What services do you provide, and how much does it cost? A: All of FIA services are completely free for any person or couple who is considering making an adoption plan for their unborn child and/or already born children. These free services include . . .… Read More

FAQ: Am I too far along to make an adoption plan? What if my baby has already been born?

Q: Am I too far along to make an adoption plan? What if my baby has already been born? A: You can make an adoption plan at any time during your pregnancy. If your baby has already been born…… Read More

FAQ: If I decide to place my child for adoption, do I have my own attorney?

Q: If I decide to place my child for adoption, do I have my own attorney or would the agency’s attorney advise me? A: You would have your own attorney who is a qualified adoption attorney, and that attorney would be free for you…… Read More

FAQ: What if I am still not sure of my decision but want to talk with someone?

Q: What if I am still not sure of my decision but want to talk with someone? A: It’s completely okay if you are not sure of your decision. If you would like to talk with someone on the phone, via video chat, or even in person, there is no pressure…… Read More

FAQ: If I eventually decide on adoption, what would be the next step?

Q: If I eventually decide on adoption, what would be the next step? A: When (and if) you are ready to move forward in making an adoption plan, FIA will connect you with an experienced staff member who will walk you through the details of making an adoption plan that feels right for you and your child…… Read More

FAQ: I think I would like a closed adoption. Can FIA help me?

Q: I think I would like a closed adoption. Can FIA help me? A: Yes! Friends in Adoption (FIA) strongly respects the birth parents’ wishes regarding whether or not there will be post-adoption contact with the adoptive family. FIA takes a person’s right to privacy very seriously and takes measures to assure all adoptions are done in a respectful and compassionate manner… Read More

FAQ: We would like to adopt. How do we begin the process?

Q: We would like to adopt. How do we begin the process? A: Before you make a decision about whether FIA is right for you, we feel that it is important for you to understand who we are, how we work, what we expect from prospective adoptive families, and how we view the adoption process… Read More

Testimonial from Laurie, Rob & Angelina

Dear FIA Friends, We are enjoying to the fullest having Angelina in our life! We are so grateful to you all for your help and support in bringing Angelina to us. She is such a happy, playful, exuberant baby, now 16 months old, delighting in the snow and her new found mobility – walking, running, dancing, climbing to her heart’s … Read More

Testimonial by Bonnie & Stephen

“My husband and I truly enjoyed working with Beth at FIA, just speaking with her would make things okay. The moment that stays in my mind working with Beth is when my husband and I were matched with a birth mom that changed her mind and did not place. Beth was extremely supportive to us as well as having compassion … Read More

FAQ: Does the agency treat biological fathers the same way they treat biological mothers?

Q: Does the agency treat biological fathers the same way they treat biological mothers? A: Yes, everyone we work with receives the kindness, caring and support they deserve from our kind and caring staff at Friends in Adoption. Your thoughts… Read More

FAQ: How do I know the family I choose will provide a safe and stable home for my child?

Q: How do I know the family I choose will provide a safe and stable home for my child? A: Friends in Adoption (FIA) is a small agency that prides itself on REALLY knowing each and every one of our prospective adoptive families. Unlike many… Read More

FAQ: As the birth father, may I choose the family for my baby?

Q: As the birth father, may I choose the family for my baby? A: If you and the baby’s mother are making this plan together for your unborn child, then it would be important for the two of you to sit down together and choose the family. If the baby’s mother has already… Read More

FAQ from Birth Father: Is it possible to speak to another man who placed his child for adoption?

Q: As a birth father, is it possible to speak to another man who placed his child for adoption? A: Yes, some of our fathers stay in touch with Friends in Adoption and would be happy to speak with you or respond by email regarding their experience. They believe…… Read More

FAQ from Birth Father: May I receive counseling to help handle the placing of my child for adoption?

Q: As a birth father, may I receive counseling to help handle the placing of my child for adoption? A: We encourage counseling throughout the process and you may attend counseling with your baby’s biological mother or alone or both — depending on the circumstances. In addition, sometimes…… Read More

FAQ by Birth Father: Who is responsible financially for the child?

Q: Who is responsible financially for the child? I am worried about the medical bills and child support. A: If you and the biological mother decide to parent, then in most if not all states, you as the legal father are financially responsible for all expenses involving the child and…… Read More

FAQ: As a birth father, can I sign legal documents placing my child for adoption prior to the child’s birth?

Q: As a birth father, can I sign legal documents placing my child for adoption prior to the child’s birth? A: In some states, you may sign a legal document prior to the child’s birth. In other states, you must wait until after the child’s birth to surrender your legal rights to your child.… Read More

FAQ: What are my legal rights as a birth father in adoption?

Q: What are my legal rights as a birth father in adoption? A: A more secure placement for your child results if you, as the biological father, participate in the adoption plan. You have the right to participate in planning for your child’s adoption and to provide medical, social and family history…… Read More

FAQ: How do adopted children feel about their birth parents?

Q: “How do adopted children feel about their birth parents?” – Anne A: “This perspective was written by an adoptee (who was 13 at the time) about her birth mother Ellen. I admire my birth mother, Ellen, for her heroic characteristics. She has done so many…… Read More

FAQ: What was it like to give up your baby?

Q: “What was it like to give up your baby? Did you get to see him/her? At any stage, did you feel any guilt or selfishness?” A: “Placing my child for adoption was a decision I had thought about a lot while I was pregnant and I knew that’s what I wanted for my baby. I was unable to give him or her all that they needed. I was lucky and got to meet the adoptive parents that I…… Read More

FAQ: Can you get help with your living expenses while you’re pregnant?

I heard that you can get help with your living expenses while you’re pregnant. I’m not sure if its through the adopting parents or the agency. Any information?… Read More

FAQ: Can a birth father contact an adoption agency?

Q: “My girlfriend is pregnant and we are both unsure about what we want to do. Can a father contact an adoption agency or is it only for mothers?” – John A: “Absolutely, fathers can contact Friends in Adoption (FIA) and that is what I did when my…… Read More

FAQ: What can I do to make adoption a little easier for both me and my 2 year old?

I have decided to place my baby for adoption. Is there anything I can do to make this a little easier for both me and my 2 year old daughter?… Read More

FAQ: Pregnant and Not Sure What to Do

Hi, I am 19 years old, and I am pregnant with my first baby girl and I am due very soon. I am very scared because I am not sure what to do. I am considering adoption, but my family and friends are not.… Read More

FAQ: I’m pregnant. What’s the next step in adoption?

Q:  If I eventually decide on adoption, what will be the next step? A: When (and if) you are ready to move forward in making an adoption plan, Friends in Adoption (FIA) will connect you with an experienced staff member who will walk you through the details of… Read More

Meet Our Potential Adoptive Families

Read adoption profiles of potential adoptive parents Meet Our Potential Adoptive Families Are you pregnant and considering adoption? Perhaps you feel ready to start reviewing profiles of potential candidates as adoptive parents for your child… If so, you can read online profiles of prospective adoptive families that have been carefully screened by Friends in Adoption and are legally approved to … Read More

Adoption Survey – Second Call for Participation

Second Call to Participate in Important Adoption Research Adam Pertman, executive director of the Evan B. Donaldson Adoption Institute shared: “We’ve had very good response to our initial call for respondents to our study. If you have already filled out a survey and/or disseminated our request, thank you enormously.  If you have not, please participate/help if you can. The most … Read More

Secrets of Adoption

Friends in Adoption (FIA) continues to be a national voice in addressing adoption myths and helping educate on open adoption in our society. Check out this CBS New York online article for prospective adoptive parents… “Secrets of Adoption: What To Know Before You Adopt a Child Home.” FIA founding director Dawn Smith Pliner is quoted throughout. Click this link to … Read More

Re-Homing Children – FIA’s Thoughts

FIA Staff Shares Thoughts on Re-Homing Children Those who follow adoption news may have read the recent Reuters Investigative Report that exposes the topic of “re-homing” children who were adopted from other countries. The report focuses on a population of unprepared adoptive parents who have sought to place their adopted children in other U.S. homes via the Internet. The staff … Read More

Father’s Rights in Adoption: An Overview

One of the questions which you may face when considering a New York adoption placement is whether the birth father has the legal right to interfere with or upset the adoption. This summary is intended to help you understand these rights so that you may effectively respond to a placement which may be presented. To begin with, the mother’s consent is required … Read More

Adoption Survey Needs Your Input

Please consider participating in this important research about the Internet and Adoption! “Shaping thoughtful, humane and ethical laws, policies and practices requires knowledge. Even though the Internet and social media are forever changing adoption, however, we know little about their impact on the tens of millions of people affected.” As a follow up to the 2012 research report entitled, Untangling … Read More

Adoption Poem: The Gift of Life

The Gift of Life I didn’t give you the gift of life, But in my heart I know. The love I feel is deep and real, As if it had been so. For us to have each other Is like a dream come true! No, I didn’t give you The gift of life, Life gave me the gift of you. … Read More

Ryan’s Story: A Birth Father

“Patty told us everything about what FIA stood for and about how things would go. She told us about open adoption — I had no idea what it was, but when I found out, I was all for it. …. Going through a teen pregnancy was definitely one of the hardest things I have had to go through, but I believe everything happens for a reason.”” src=”https://www.friendsinadoption.orgadoption-guide/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/Ryan-Story-Birth-Father-Adoption-300×234.jpg” width=”300″ height=”234″ /> “Patty told us everything about what FIA stood for and about how things would go. She told us about open adoption — I had no idea what it was, but when I found out, I was all for it. …. Going through a teen pregnancy was definitely one of the hardest things I have had to go through, but I believe everything happens for a reason.” …… Read More

End of DOMA Doesn’t Mean Adoption Equality for Same-Sex Couples

Originally written by: Rebecca Ruiz, TODAY contributor Click HERE to read original article Marcie Fisher-Borne was overjoyed when the Supreme Court struck down a key part of the Defense of Marriage Act last month: The federal government would finally acknowledge her same-sex marriage. Yet, there was one critical thing the DOMA ruling couldn’t give either Marcie or her wife Chantelle: … Read More

Welcome Home, John!

“Beth was our main contact at Friends in Adoption (FIA) while we were active and prior to the birth of our son, she is very kind and caring. Beth is very committed to taking care of the waiting families and guiding them through the process. At our request, we checked in with Beth monthly to get an update on how many of our profiles went out in the prior month. She was very accommodating to this request and always responded quickly and with as much detail as possible. We appreciated Beth’s coordination of the Stay Acquainted meetings; we found it very helpful during our waiting period.”

Trish and Matt, adoptive parents

Read More

New Study on Adoption, Family Diversity

Update: Some external hyperlinks links for this article have been removed and the text below is for research purposes only. Reason: The links will take our readers to a broken page. The original URLs were kept within the text, but with added spaces to eliminate the hyperlinks. INSTITUTE SEEKS ADOPTIVE PARENTS FOR NEW STUDY ON FAMILY DIVERSITY The Donaldson Adoption Institute is … Read More

US Supreme Court Strikes Down DOMA

DOMA Ruled as Unconstitutional In a 5-4 ruling today, the Supreme Court ruled the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) to be unconstitutional, on the grounds that it discriminates against gay people who are in a lawful same sex marriage. This ruling allows married gay and lesbian couples to have the same legal right as heterosexual married couples. Same sex couples … Read More

Welcome Home, Colton!

“My husband and I truly enjoyed working with Beth at Friends in Adoption (FIA), just speaking with her would make things okay. The moment that stays in my mind working with Beth is when my husband and I were matched with a birth mom that changed her mind and did not place. Beth was extremely supportive to us as well as having compassion for the birth mom. Beth clearly wants what is best for everyone involved. She is extremely passionate about her work and I will never forget the look of excitement on her face when I stopped by to introduce her to our recently adopted son.” — Steve and Bonnie, adoptive parents… Read More

Lisa’s Story: A Birth Mother

My name is Lisa and I am honored to say that I am a Friends in Adoption Birth Mother. At the age of 39 I found myself in a much unplanned situation. I was on birth control and involved in a very nice relationship, becoming pregnant was the least of my worries after all there is only a .2 percent failure … Read More

Welcome Home, Leo!

Michael and Jody welcome home, Leo!

Congratulations on your Finalization Day! — June 2013… Read More

Happy Father’s Day!

Happy Father’s Day to all the Dads, Birth Fathers, and Adoptive Fathers out there. Enjoy your day!

Letter from FIA Alumni

We recently received this letter from a past FIA alumni family and wanted to share (with permission). Hi Dawn, Our son Zachary graduates from high school this week. His birth mom is coming out for it and we are all excited. Thanks for helping us in 1994. We love our son and are so proud of his accomplishments. I’ve attached … Read More

Many Older Parents Adopting Children

‘Too Old To Adopt’? Not The Case For These Parents Originally published by Ann Brenoff at the Huffington Post, July 3, 2012 Click here to read the original article A recent study of Americans’ attitudes toward aging contained this little gem: Respondents thought people should stop having children by age 41, on average. While nature — at least for women … Read More

Friends in Adoption at Pride Palooza

Friends in Adoption case manager Nan Pasquarello was at the Pride Palooza this past Saturday, June 8 in Binghamton, NY. Were you there? Did you say Hi to Nan? This was a fun filled kid-friendly event that featured music, food, and community resources for the LGBTQ communities and allies.

Jamie Lee Curtis Adoption Quote

Jamie Lee Curtis: Actress, Children’s Book Writer and Adoptive Mother… has one of our favorite quotes about adoption.

We look at adoption as a very sacred exchange. It was not done lightly on either side. I would dedicate my life to this child. – Jamie Lee Curtis… Read More

Congratulations Aanya on your Adoption Finalization Day!

Erin and Brett are pleased to welcome Aanya into their lives!

Welcome Home Aanya!

Congratulations on your Finalization Day! — June 2013… Read More

Friends in Adoption Applauds the Abortion Care Network

Friends In Adoption would like to applaud the efforts of ACN, the Abortion Care Network, for its good work caring for and respecting women. The Abortion Care Network is a non-profit network of independent abortion providers, allies, and individuals who provide quality care for women. Its activities include resources for those considering abortion, efforts to de-stigmatize abortion, and ongoing training … Read More

Adoption is Not the Same as Having a Child of Your Own

Originally Written by: Dawn Davenport, of Creating a Family May 18, 2010 “Adoption Is Not The Same As Having A Child Of Your Own”: The statement that adoption is not the same as having a child of your own is both remarkably accurate and remarkably wrong.  The first part—“not the same as”—is quite true.  Adoption and giving birth are two very … Read More

CLOSURE – A Documentary About an Adoptee’s Quest to Find her Birth Mother

A new adoption documentary has been produced by film maker Bryan Tucker. It documents 26 year old Angela Tucker’s journey as a transracial adoptee to find her birth mother. It has been generating a lot of interest in the adoption world. Have a look at the promo over at their kickstarter page here: http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1885614069/closure-adoption-documentary Review Addison Cooper, who regularly reviews adoption … Read More

I’m Pregnant And Considering Adoption For My Unborn Baby

If you are facing an unplanned pregnancy you are going to be making some tough decisions. If you are considering adoption, Friends in Adoption can help you with an adoption plan that is right for you and your baby. ◊ How to Get Started: Call one of our caring and experienced staff at 1-800-982-3678 who are available to answer any questions you may have. … Read More

Gay Adoption: The Kids are All Right

Written by: Dr. Peggy Drexler – Author, ‘Our Fathers, Ourselves. Daughters, Fathers, and the Changing American Family’ Originally published by The Huffington Post, May 23, 2012 The Kids Are All Right: Gay Parents Raising Children These days, gay parents are no novelty: We see them strolling through our neighborhoods, participating in our PTA meetings, and, perhaps most notably, appearing on our TV … Read More

Joan McNamara Adoption Quote

“It has been said that adoption is more like a marriage than a birth: two (or more) individuals, each with their own unique mix of needs, patterns, and genetic history, coming together with love, hope, and commitment for a joint future. You become a family not because you share the same genes, but because you share love for each other.”

Joan McNamara
Author and Adoptive parent… Read More

What I’ve Learned as an Adoptive Mother

A great article written by Carrie Goldman from an adoptive mother’s perspective and what she’s learned about motherhood. What I Know About Motherhood Now That I am an Adoptive Mother Written by: Carrie Goldman, Author, BULLIED: What Every Parent, Teacher, and Kid Needs to Know About Ending the Cycle of Fear Originally published by the Huffington Post, May 10, 2013 Motherhood is … Read More

Congratulations Olivia on Your Adoption Finalization Day

Congratulations to Olivia!! Elizabeth, Liz, and Olivia are just one of the many happy adoptive families who have successfully adopted with Friends in Adoption in the recent months. Click here to see more FIA Alumni Families who have adopted. For over 30 years, Friends in Adoption has helped create over 1,000 forever families through adoption.

Adoption Poem by Fleur Conkling Heyliger

Not flesh of my flesh
Nor bone of my bone,
But still miraculously my own.
Never forget for a single minute,
You didn’t grow under my heart
But in it.
– Fleur Conkling Heyliger
Read More

Nia Vardalos Visits with Friends in Adoption

Nia Vardalos, adoptive mom, author & actress, stops by for a picture with Dawn Smith-Pliner, Founder/Director of Friends in Adoption, at the QUAD A Conference in San Diego, on April 25, 2013.  

Dear Moms of Adopted Children – by Kathy Lynn Harris

Kathy Lynn Harris, author of “A Good Kind of Knowing” and “Blue Straggler,” has written this wonderful article about adoption. It is very well written and worth the time to read it. Dear Moms of Adopted Children by Kathy Lynn Harris Click HERE for the original article First, a quick note: I wrote this piece after reading an essay written by Lea … Read More

Dawn’s thoughts for Birth Mother’s Day

Dawn’s Thoughts on Mother’s Day

I miss my grandmothers

I miss my mother and my G-Dmother

I think of Joyce and Carol – my children’s birthmothers

I am thankful for all the women who have become mothers because of the strength and love of birthmothers… Read More

Gay Marriage and Adoption: Doing What’s Right for Children

Adam Pertman, Executive Director, Evan B. Donaldson Adoption Institute; author, ‘Adoption Nation’ and ‘Adoption by Lesbians and Gay Men,’ wrote this very succinct and eloquent article about political views, recent court cases, and gay and lesbian couples’ legal right to marry and how it affects their families with adopted children. The main point: Gay parents benefit children who are in need of families, but these … Read More

Supreme Court To Hear Arguments On Indian Child Welfare Act

Originally written by MEG KINNARD and published at the Huffington Post on 04/14/13. COLUMBIA, S.C. — The U.S. Supreme Court this week will hear an emotional family challenge to longstanding federal law on the adoption of Native American children, with several states, tribes and children’s welfare groups lining up to support the current rules. The case involves a South Carolina … Read More

Adoption and the LGBT Community

Originally published by The Guardian Express, 03/21/13. Click HERE to read the original article. There are many children around the United States in need of loving homes, many of whom will spend their lives in foster homes till their eighteenth birthday. However, there are also many lesbian and gay couples and singles who are able and want to raise and … Read More

What to Expect with Friends in Adoption

If you choose to explore adoption with FIA, you can expect to: Learn about the choices you have in creating an adoption plan that fits you and your needs, including how much contact you want, both before and after your child’s birth. Have your privacy and confidentiality maintained. Have FIA’s kind and experienced staff available to support you 24 hours … Read More

A Birth Mother with the Right Regrets

Originally published in the New York Times, 02/24/13. Written by CLAUDIA CORRIGAN D’ARCY Click HERE to read the original article My mother looked shocked and said, “I can’t raise this baby for you,” but I was ready with my reply. “You won’t have to,” I said. “I’ll have this baby and give it up for adoption.” Like some magic answer I plucked … Read More

Dave Thomas Adoption Quote

Dave Thomas says it best when it comes to marriage equality, adoption and family! “People ask me: ‘What about gay adoptions? Interracial? Single Parent?’ I say: ‘Hey fine, as long as it works for the child and the family is responsible.’ My big stand is this: Every child deserves a home and love. Period.“ — Dave Thomas

Friends in Adoption supports Marriage Equality

Supporters of marriage equality will gather outside the Supreme Court on the first day of hearings: March 26 at 8:30 a.m. in Washington, D.C. Together we will show the nation that we believe all Americans deserve to be treated fairly and equally under the law — no matter who they love.… Read More

Why White People Adopt Black Babies

Written By RACHEL GARLINGHOUSE Originally posted at mybrownbaby.com African Americans have every reason to be suspicious of white people adopting black babies. From slavery to unethical medical experimentation to Jim Crow laws and more, history demonstrates that white people haven’t always been very kind to people of color, to say the least. As an English teacher, I read many books, … Read More

Five things to Never Say to an Adoptive Parent

Written by Suzanne Murray on CafeMom’s blog, The Stir. Published by the Huffington Post on 03/03/2013. A while ago, I was thinking of adopting a child. When I told a friend, she asked, “But don’t you want any of your own?” I was floored. Years later, a co-worker always referred to her friend’s kid as “Lisa’s adopted baby.” That would be … Read More

Friends in Adoption at the Ametz Adoption and Family Conference

Friends in Adoption Staff: Dawn, Jean-Charles, Beth, and Johna (not pictured) were having a great time at the Ametz Conference for Adoption and Family, March 10 2013 in NYC.

Welcome Home, Hunter!

Tracy and Jim welcome home: Hunter!

Congratulations on your Finalization Day! — March 2013… Read More

Jennifer and Darrin Welcome Sabrina Home!

Jennifer and Darrin welcome home: Sabrina!

Congratulations on your Finalization Day! — March 2013… Read More

New ACOG Opinion on Ethics in Adoption for OB-GYN Practitioners

– by: Nan Pasquarello, Case Manager This past summer, The American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG) Committee on Ethics issued a Committee Opinion that clarifies best practice for physicians with regard to adoption. The articulated guidelines will benefit women and couples who are considering adoption for their babies. This article summarizes highlights from the recent opinion and shares its … Read More

Jenn, Jeff & Addie Welcome Home Alex

“Dear Friends in Adoption, we wanted to take this time to thank all of those at FIA who helped us finalize our family. We can’t say enough about the staff at FIA and our peace of mind knowing that FIA will always be there for our family and our for our birth parents as we begin this journey.”… Read More

We Found Our Son in the Subway

Originally published in the New York Times, 02/28/13.

Written By PETER MERCURIO
Click HERE to read the original article.

The story of how Danny and I were married last July in a Manhattan courtroom, with our son, Kevin, beside us, began 12 years earlier, in a dark, damp subway station…… Read More

Welcome home, Serena!

Josephine and Virgilio are very excited to welcome home: Serena!

Congratulations on your Finalization Day! — March 2013… Read More

19th Annual Adoption and the Family Conference – 10 Mar 2013

FIA will be in attendance! Drop by and say “Hi” to Dawn and meet the FIA staff members at their Table! Dawn will also be a speaker at one of the workshops. Conference Details: Ametz is holding its 19th annual ADOPTION and the FAMILY CONFERENCE… on Sunday, March 10, 2013, 8:00 AM – 5:00 PM *Please Note: Daylight Savings Time begins this day! at The … Read More

The Adoption Process: Trying To Write The Perfect Letter To A Birth Mom

How Can We Convince Her We Are THE ONES? Written by Sheila Quirke for Portrait of an Adoption Published in The Huffington Post Last month we had our home visit. A social worker that we have told our deepest (pretty shallow), darkest (more like dusk) family secrets to dropped by for a visit to see our home and meet our … Read More

She’s My Girl, Just As If She Were Born To Us

Andrew, Adoptive Father: ‘Love And Devotion Do Not Require The Same DNA’ Originally Written by Andrew for Portrait of an Adoption There was never a question in my mind that we would adopt. Carrie and I had many conversations when we were first married about adopting. It just happened in a different sequence than we had envisioned. After losing Matthew, … Read More

Top 5 Benefits of Open Adoption

Open Adoption Versus Closed Adoption By Dustin Freund For many couples entering into the adoption process for the first time, the idea of an open adoption can seem a little bit troubling. Common questions and fears many adoptive families have about open adoption are, “Will the biological parents attempt to get their child back? Will the adoptee be confused with two … Read More

A History Lesson in Open and Closed Adoption

Have adoptions in America typically been open or closed? You may be surprised at the answer. The following article discusses the openness of early adoptions in America, and when changes were made. Adoption has not always been under the scope of public law and accordingly has been somewhat informal, but it has historically been quite open. If a child was … Read More

Dangers of Using Facebook to Search for Birth Families

Impact of Social Media on Post Adoption What do you do if your adopted child wants to make contact with his or her birth families? Social Media is making it easier to do this on your own, but it is not necessarily the best approach. Dawn Smith-Pliner of Friends in Adoption (FIA) had this to say about the Post Adoption … Read More

Pregnant and Considering Adoption – What Next?

Thinking about Adoption and Wondering Where to get More Information? We understand that considering an adoption plan for your unborn baby or child raises many questions and your choices may feel overwhelming. Our staff is here to be supportive, answer your questions and guide you through your many choices regarding a potential adoption plan. Friends in Adoption (FIA) is a licensed adoption … Read More

Video – Birth Mom & Adoptive Mom Discuss Open Adoption

View a 7-minute movie of a real adoption story — Adoptive mom Lisa and birth mother Jessica have something in common: David, their son. In this touching video, both women share their experiences of going through the adoption process from different perspectives.… Read More

What is a Home Study?

Preparing your Home for an Adopted Child The home study is “your life story“. You will probably have several interviews with your social worker, both in your home and possibly in his/her office. The social worker will not be coming into your home to do a “white glove” inspection. Don’t exhaust yourself cleaning and polishing! If your home is “too … Read More

From One Adoptive Mom to Another

A letter to Other Adoptive Parents One adoptive mother’s thoughts on making sure the birthmother is not forgotten in an open adoption. Click HERE  to read the entire article. An excerpt: There is an issue that has been weighing on my mind lately. I have heard from a number of birthmothers who chose open adoption who feel forgotten by and … Read More

Breaking Adoption Tax Credit News!

Update on the Adoption Tax Credit The federal adoption tax credit, originally set to expire on December 31, 2012, became permanent on January 2, 2013.  Now we are pleased to share even more good news that has been announced by the IRS this week. If you or someone you know is currently pursuing an adoption or considering adoption you’ll want … Read More

Road to Success – an Adoption Story

A testimonial by Jen and John, about their Experience with Friends in Adoption. “Welcome Home” After enduring many years of infertility treatment, we reached the end of our rope one September afternoon. The doctor had called to tell us that the in vitro treatment that cost us close to $7500 had failed. We could keep going, but there was less … Read More

Elizabeth, Welcome Home!!

Stephen, Brent, & Zachary welcome home: Elizabeth!

Congratulations on your Finalization Day! — January 2013… Read More

Congratulations Seth, and Welcome Home!

John, Danielle, & Aaron welcome home: Seth!

Congratulations on your Finalization Day! — January 2013… Read More

Adoption Tax Credit Made Permanent!

Obama Includes Adoption Tax Credit with New Bill The Adoption Tax Credit was part of the Congressional deal. President Obama will sign the Bill tomorrow. Of the four pillars of the Adoption Tax Credit Working Group, we succeeded with three.  The credit has been made permanent, the credit is inclusive of both domestic and Inter-country adoptions, and it is flat for special needs. Refundability is … Read More

From Dawn: To Our Waiting Families

To Our Waiting Families~ You are all in my thoughts. I have never forgotten Christmas 1979. My younger sister was pregnant and due to deliver any minute~the first grandchild in our family. Joel and I were waiting for the arrival of our baby through adoption~ due any minute. How many holidays had we spent surrounded by friends and families and … Read More

How Families Benefit from The Adoption Tax Credit

Click on the following link to read or listen to NPR Radio Host David Greene talk about the Adoption Tax Credit and how it helps adoptive families. http://www.npr.org/2012/12/18/167506453/how-adoption-tax-credit-benefits-families?sc=emaf This is an important topic as the Adoption Tax Credit could expire at the end of this year.

Welcome Home, Austin!

“Words can’t quite capture how grateful we are for you and all you’ve done to make Austin, Mark and I a family! From our very first call you worked from a place of respect and love, for all involved. Thank you for being such an amazing liaison between Emma, Dan, Mark and me. During a potentially nerve-racking process, you guided us with warmth and ease — and we’ll forever remember and value your role in our adoption story!”… Read More

Life is so fragile

“Our thoughts are with the families in Ct. Life is so fragile.  We all need  to take care of one another.” – Dawn

Welcome Home, Jacob!

James and Tracy are pleased to welcome home: Jacob!

Congratulations on your Finalization Day! — December 2012… Read More

Important breaking news about marriage equality.

https://myaccount.nytimes.com/auth/login?URI=www-nc.nytimes.com/2012/12/08/us/supreme-court-agrees-to-hear-two-cases-on-gay-marriage.html&REFUSE_COOKIE_ERROR=SHOW_ERROR; WASHINGTON — The Supreme Court announced on Friday that it would enter the national debate over same-sex marriage, agreeing to hear a pair of cases challenging state and federal laws that define marriage to include only unions of a man and a woman.

Welcome Catelynn!

Suzanne and Allan welcome home: Catelynn!Read More

Welcome Home Claire!

Jay and Caroline welcome home Claire!

Congratulations on your Finalization Day! — December 2012… Read More

Hillary and Rob welcome home: Gavin!

Hillary and Rob are proud to welcome home: Gavin!

Congratulations on your Finalization Day! — December 2012… Read More

Welcome Home Kenley!

Kevin and David welcome home: Kenley!

Congratulations on your Finalization Day! — December 2012… Read More

Congratulations Andrew, and Welcome Home!

AG, Michelle, Abbie, Ella, and Eliza welcome home: Andrew!

Congratulations on your Finalization Day! — December 2012… Read More

Welcome Home, Cooper!

“We first met June (a Friends in Adoption (FIA) case worker) at the hospital the morning we were to bring Cooper home. June made sure we knew what the hospital experience would be like and what to expect. When we were brought into the little room where our sweet new son was waiting, June gave us lots of time and space to take in this perfect little boy we loved immediately. June completely shared our excitement and made that nervous feeling go away”

— Dave, Sandy and Sawyer

Read More

Welcome Home, Lucas!

Michelle and Dave welcome home, Lucas!Read More

Lisa and Lawrence Welcome Home: Indigo!

Lisa and Lawrence welcome home, Indigo!Read More

Lisa and Paul Welcome Home: Rene!

Lisa and Paul welcome home, Rene!Read More

Steve and Kelly Welcome Home: Olivia!

Steve and Kelly are overjoyed to welcome home, Olivia!Read More

Jim and Tony welcome home: Maya!

Jim and Tony welcome home, Maya!Read More

Chris and JoAnna are happy to Welcome Home: Evan!

“From the moment we walked through the doors at our Getting Acquainted Workshop, we felt that FIA was the right agency for us. Every moment we’ve spent with the FIA staff since has confirmed that our initial gut feeling was correct. We can’t imagine a more capable, compassionate, empathetic, dedicated, loving, hardworking, and all-around amazing group of people. We feel so lucky that as we were in the process of adopting, we were simultaneously being adopted ourselves, into the loving FIA family!”

Chris and JoAnna, adoptive parents

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Suzan and Eric Welcome Home, Nicholas

Suzan and Eric are very excited to welcome home: Nicholas!Read More

Welcome Home, Emmaline!

Sara, Mike and Amelia are happy to welcome home, Emmaline!Read More

Welcome Home: Sabrina!

Regina, Karl, Spencer, and Samantha welcome home: Sabrina!Read More

Lily is Welcomed Home!

Christine, Jeremy, and Angela welcome home: Lily!Read More

Skylar, Welcome Home!

Marc, Laura, Forrest, and Rosalie welcome: Skylar into their lives!… Read More

FIA Family Album: Isabella and Abigail

Isabella and Abigail are pictured in front of the Children’s Museum on Sunday. We visited both girls birth families this weekend … great time! They live about 30 min from each other … how awesome is that! … Read More

Adoption Tax Credit – Help Save It

Act Now to Save The Adoption Tax Credit Before It’s Gone! The adoption child tax credit is one of the many parts of the U.S. tax code that could change dramatically on Jan. 1, 2013, if Congress and President Barack Obama do not act. Adoption advocates worry the changes would make adopting a child more difficult for middle income families.… Read More

Lucy, Welcome Home!

Kathy and Dave welcome home: Lucy!Read More

Welcome Home, Caleb!

Shawn, Martha, and Zachariah welcome: Caleb into their lives!… Read More

Happy to Welcome Connor Home!

Kevin, Kelly, and Katelyn are very excited to welcome Connor home!… Read More

Sydney is Welcomed Home!

Keri, Kory, and Ella are excited to welcome Sydney into their lives!… Read More

Welcome Home Jackson!

Patty, Ron, and Hannah welcome home: Jackson!Read More

Welcome Home Samuel!

Lauren, Caroline and Abigail are so happy to welcome home: Samuel into their lives!… Read More

Jon and Brian Welcome Home: Ian!

Jon and Brian welcome home: Ian!

FIA helped us through each stage of the process and made sure we felt comfortable with every new step. Each member of their staff is so full of knowledge which passed down through Dawn whose experience in the field is both unparalleled and unique.” – Brian and Jon… Read More

Tenderly – An Adoption Story

Tenderly Back in the 1950’s one ethnic group seemed to follow another in the neighborhood of my youth. The ethnicity of the teachers in my grade school once dominated, but they were slowly moving out as those of mine moved in. I had long black hair that was my mother’s pride and joy. She brushed it every morning, sometimes pinning it up in braids … Read More

APC Adoption Conference in Brooklyn – Nov 18 2012

Adoption Conference – Presented by the Adoptive Parents Committee November 18, 2012 in Brooklyn NY Are you going to the APC Adoption Conference? Drop by and say “Hi” to Dawn and meet the FIA staff members at their Table. http://www.adoptiveparents.org/ This is the 32nd Annual Adoption Conference presented by the Adoptive Parents Committee, Inc.(APC). This year’s conference, a day-long event, will be … Read More

What is "Real" Mommy? — An Adoption Story

November is National Adoption Awareness Month and 2012 is the year when Friends in Adoption celebrates it’s 30th anniversary. We celebrate both events by bringing back great adoption stories from our newsletter, Journeys, to our blog. Enjoy!… Read More

Landrieu Introduces Bill to Make Adoption More Affordable

Making Adoption Affordable Act WASHINGTON—U.S. Senator Mary L. Landrieu, D-La., today introduced the Making Adoption Affordable Act to support families that have made the wonderful decision to adopt. The Adoption Tax Credit (ATC) helps defray the sometimes high administrative fees associated with adoptions, ensuring that families that want to adopt are not discouraged by the high cost of the process. The Making … Read More

IAC Center Workshops for All Stages of Adoption

Workshop Offerings from the Infertility & Adoption Counseling Center … from the IAC Center Director: Hello, I am sharing IAC Center’s Fall offerings. Our monthly  Pre-Adoptive Parents Support Groups are in Pennington and Montclair NJ; and NYC. In addition, we have a NEW group for families who have been waiting awhile or who have experienced a fall-through. We believe that these couples or singles … Read More

Huffington Post Family Friday – Submit Your Pics!

FIA Families: Send in your Photos for Family Friday The Huffington Post is asking for photos of LGBT Families for their feature “Family Friday: Share and Celebrate Your Families With Us!”  Each Friday, a selected family will be highlighted with a write up. –>So come on FIA families, submit your photos today! Here’s the original article (with a great gallery … Read More

Open Adoptions on the Rise

Openness in Adoption Spreading Across the U.S The Wall Street Journal ran a story about how Open Adoptions are on the rise, by Mara Lemos Stein. “As opposed to closed or confidential adoptions, open adoptions allow the adoptive and birth families some degree of contact, which can range from a single, in-person meeting to sharing photos and news periodically, to … Read More

Act Now to Save $12,650 Adoption Tax Credit!

The current Adoption Tax Credit of $12,650 could be lost at the end of this year, unless you act now! Please help save the Adoption Tax Credit by contacting your representative in Congress. Important note: If your U.S. Representative is a Republican member of Congress it is especially important to contact them about H.R. 4373. This is bipartisan – 2 … Read More

WNYC Radio Talks About Gay Dads

Abbie Goldberg, associate professor of psychology at Clark University, senior research fellow at the Evan B. Donaldson Adoption Institute, regular blogger for Psychology Today and the author of Gay Dads: Transitions to Adoptive Fatherhood, looks at the specific issues faced by gay couples when adopting children. You can listen to a recording of the show from this link: http://tunein.com/topic/?TopicId=40492013

Memories from Friends in Adoption Annual Picnic 2012

Miracles happened at the 30th Friends in Adoption Picnic yesterday. I felt honored to be able to watch. I went up to say hi to one of our kids (young adult) and hugging her, inquired as to where her parents were sitting. She laughed and said- oh, they are at a show so I drove here with one of my … Read More

Rhode Island Opens Adoption Records for First Time

Adult Adoptees get Access to Birth Certificates in R.I. On July 2 2012, the state of Rhode Island began issuing original birth certificates to adult adoptees. Read the original new article and video published by The Providence Journal by going to: http://www.providencejournal.com/breaking-news/content/ Video: An excerpt from the news article: PROVIDENCE, R.I. — Dozens of adults who had been adopted as … Read More

Testimonial by Brian, a birth father

“We went together and talked to our Case Manager and she told us everything about what FIA stood for and how things would go. She told us about open adoption which I had no idea what it was, but when I found out I was all for it.” —Brian, a birth father

Call Today to Save the Adoption Tax Credit

Save the Adoption Tax Credit! TAKE ACTION! Please Call Today! ASK YOUR U.S. REPRESENTATIVE 
TO CO-SPONSOR H.R. 4373 Dear Supporter of Adoption: If Congress does not act, the tax credit as we now know it will expire on December 31, 2012. If the adoption tax credit helped you or someone you know to adopt a child or if it could … Read More

Testimonial from Emma, a birth mother

“My Case Manager was kind, understanding, helpful, and answered every single ridiculous question and listened to everything that had happened without judgment. This, in my opinion, was the start of making this story as amazing as it was.” —Emma, a birth mother

Batter Up!

Does Age Matter When Adopting? How old are you? Adoptive moms and dads can often be on the older end of the spectrum. By the time we realize that adoption is our best option (and a most wonderful option it is), we are older, wiser and creakier. We may share carpooling with women who are almost young enough to be … Read More

Thank You, President Obama, for supporting full marriage equality

President Obama’s announcement today that he supports marriage equality is not only a great victory for marriage equality nationwide, but it is also directly linked to achieving fairness in adoption rights by same-sex couples. We are thankful that our President evolved and stood up for what’s right! Thank you, Mr. President! — Friends in Adoption (Click to watch video of … Read More

The Get Acquainted Workshop – Review by FIA family

“Today is a very exciting day for both of us as we just officially signed on with FIA. We cannot thank your staff enough for the GAW in Vermont. The information you shared and the knowledge of your staff was just incredible! You all truly made finalizing our decision a very easy process. There is a lot to be said about an organization that can truly convey their passion about what they do…… Read More

GAW review – by Alan and Laura

“Dear FIA Staff, Thank you, again, for organizing such a terrific GAW. We were extremely impressed with all of you and are grateful for the information you provided as well as the issues you raised for discussion and consideration. We’re really glad we attended the workshop and expect to be in…… Read More

Friends in Adoption – Photos from Quad-A Event

Friends in Adoption at Quad-A Conference Friends in Adoption Staff members: Dawn Smith-Pliner (FIA Founder and Director) and Lynn Sakadolsky (FIA Case Manager), together with Birth Mother Jessie Jo, attend the Quad-A Conference in Indianapolis, Indiana.  Below are some photos from today’s event, May 3, 2012.

FIA Get Acquainted Workshop – Review by Jon and Sara

“Dear FIA, The Get Acquainted workshop was so helpful for Sara and me. We went in knowing that we wanted to adopt, but would have held off if there were any “red flags” that we heard. We fully understand that adoption is a major commitment and didn’t want to have any reservations about it. This workshop erased any reservation/myths about adoption that we had or had heard. We truly feel that FIA cares about both their adoptive parents and birth mothers. Having the staff there to speak with us, both formally and informally really…… Read More

Help Save the Adoption Tax Credit!

Advocate to Save the Adoption Tax Credit! The adoption tax credit is due to “sunset” at the end of this year unless Congress and the Administration act. In February the President proposed making the adoption tax credit permanent in the budget he submitted to Congress for fiscal year 2013, but its fate is uncertain. To read up on the adoption tax credit and to take … Read More

Friends in Adoption GAW – Review by Jess and Mark

“Dear FIA, We had a WONDERFUL time during our Get Acquainted Workshop. When our friends and family asked what it was that made our agency so much better than all the others we met with, we explained that although the presentation was knowledgeable and clear about the logistics of adoption and it’s processes, the emphasis was on the human and family aspect of adoption. We shared with them how relieved…… Read More

Friends in Adoption Workshop – Review

“We were so impressed! I would say that one of the things that stood out to me is the unique approach that FIA takes. I think the mandatory GAW and many of the principles that FIA adheres to proves that it is an organization that really puts the kids first — and to me, anyone who is looking to make an adoption plan or to become adoptive parents should put the kids first. That was…… Read More

New Law Allows Requests for Birth Records

Adoptees can now request birth records thanks to new law passed in Illinois. Article from the Chicago Tribune talks with adoptees who have chosen to take advantage of the new Illinois law and get a copy of their birth certificate. “For nearly 50 years, Bob Brown longed to know the identity of his birth mother. Adopted as a baby, he … Read More

Mending a Birthmother's Broken Heart After Adoption

How to Mend a Broken Heart after Placing your Baby for Adoption. Can FIA mend a birthmom’s broken heart after adoption?  No. FIA cannot mend the sadness in your heart because that sadness is the love you feel for your child. The pain of loss after placement is real, because you are a real mother. You just made a heartwrenching … Read More

Embracing FIA

Embracing Friends In Adoption Dawn Smith Pliner started FIA 30 years ago when traditional agencies responded to her and Joel’s desire to adopt a child with a clipped, formidable, and decisive “no”. The response came before anyone had the chance to get to know them. Power can be like that. It can feed on itself. But power is also found … Read More

Adoption Tax Credit

Help Extend the Adoption Tax Credit Everyone get your kit to help extend the adoption tax credit. Grassroots Advocacy Kit on the Adoption Tax Credit Now Available from NCFA. adoptioncouncil.org The National Council For Adoption (NCFA), a longtime supporter of the adoption tax credit, joins fellow adoption and child welfare advocates in calling for the extension of the adoption tax … Read More

Snapshots

Snapshots – A Birth Grandmother’s Story written by Casey Mulligan Walsh kwalsh3@nycap.rr.com All around us there were picture-perfect people. I knew I had no idea what their lives were really like, but through this lens they all appeared so normal. My husband, my daughter, Kate, and I looked no different from the rest. Still, I struggled to maintain balance, presenting … Read More

Forum Focusing on Hurdles for Adopted Teens

An Afternoon with Debbie Riley Touched By Adoption, LLC and The Connecticut Adoption Community Network jointly present The Third Annual Adoption Education Forum entitled An Afternoon With Debbie Riley, MS. Ms. Riley is the Chief Executive Officer of The Center For Adoption Support and Education, Inc. (C.A.S.E.) and co-author of the book, Beneath the Mask, Understanding Adopted Teens. She has … Read More

How Openness Changed Adoption

Author of “Adoption Nation” Talks about how Openness has Changed Adoption Adam Pertman talks about how openness has transformed the adoption process and how adoption has changed us.  Below are some excerpt from the article: “Openness can pervade all types of adoption. It’s about honesty, information and contact with your own past and your knowledge of it. It’s about contact … Read More

Top 10 Ways to Help Friends Through Adoption Process

10 Things to Help and Support Your Friends Through Their Adoption Journey Ask your friends if they have cards stating their desire to adopt that you can leave at restaurants, airports, train stations etc. Go to your friend’s profile on www.friendsinadoption.org and press the “Like” button. Sponsor an adoption ad for your friends – newspaper, internet, or google. E-mail beth@friendsinadoption.org … Read More

Striving for Adoption

The Almighty “A” My son just missed honors. He had a few A’s here, a B there and a low C way over in left field. He must work harder. He was one point away! If he could get the C to a B, or the B to an A or the A to an A+ he would get his … Read More

Transracial Adoptee Challenges

Difficulties Growing up as a Transracial Adoptee “The adoption is noticeable, but it’s a good thing too because it shows that your parents love you so much that they didn’t just have you … they chose you.” – Donye’ Brown-Lamm Here is a very thought provoking article about the challenges and difficulties of being a transracial adoptee, even in a city which … Read More

Adoptive Parent Testimonial

Testimonial from FIA Adoptive Parent Hello Dawn, Ken and I very much enjoyed our conversation with you the other day. The outreach, support, and resources from FIA has been outstanding. I’m sure we will be looking to FIA for advice as Addison grows and meets challenges in his life. Can you imagine what the world would be like if EVERY … Read More

Enjoy the Wait

“I Just don’t have Time for You” It’s 4:30 a.m. and I need to get out of bed by 5:30 a.m. This hour is essential because I need time to think, time to prioritize the day. I’m tired because I also went to bed too late. The goody bags needed to be packed, and now I will be grumpy and … Read More

Transracial Adoption

Raising a Child of Another Race Here’s an interesting article that talks about the challenges of raising a child who is of a different race than the adoptive parents. “Acknowledging that transracial parenting is an inexact science, we’ve learned some important lessons along the way. Diversity is not enough. Diversity is good, just not enough, if it does not include … Read More

Dancing with Tradition

FIA alumni in the news A brief article in The Boston Globe, written by Cindy Cantrell, about Zion (age 11), a Friends in Adoption family member who is now performing in “The Nutcracker.’’ DANCING WITH TRADITION: When Zion was 3 years old, his mothers, Stacey and Jessie, enrolled him in a basketball class, but he cried. Next they put him in … Read More

AIDS and Pregnancy

A need-to-know for all pregnant women. This information could save a baby’s life.

If you have AIDS and find out you are pregnant or think you may be pregnant, you should let your health care provider know as soon as possible. Some AIDS medicines may harm your baby. Your health care provider may want you to take different medicines or change the doses.… Read More

Adoption Portrayed on TV

Discussing Adoption on TV show: “Once Upon a Time” Here’s an interesting blog post discussing the portrayal of adoption in the TV series: “Once Upon a Time.” http://thesocietypages.org/socimages/2011/11/29/discourses-on-adoption-on-once-upon-a-time/

Adoption by Aura age 12

Adoption By Aura – age 12 – Written in 1992 “To be adopted is special. It means someone out there, really, really loves you. No one should be sad, You should be glad that someone out there loves you. When you are a baby, people laugh for you. And when you giggle, they give you all of their ahh’s and … Read More

Friends in Adoption Annual Appeal

Friends in Adoption 29th Annual Appeal ~ Divine Attitude, Divine Gratitude Dear Incredible Friends, On my way to work the other day, my mind was racing in a million different directions. I was feeling weighed down by the mental check list of tasks waiting for my attention and so I tuned into the car radio for some levity and distraction. … Read More

Review from Jesse, a birth mom

“Most of my contact with my Case Manager was over the phone or via email but I couldn’t help but feel this radiating smile casting over me every time we communicated. She gave me hope. She gave me a sense of normalcy.” —Jesse, a birth mom

The imprint your choices have made

(Written by a birth mother) Who are you now? I was meeting with a guy I had known only from a distance. Never thought seriously about going out with him, but here we were, in a diner, splitting a turkey sub and mugs of steaming hot coffee. I wanted him to know about the baby I placed for adoption, so … Read More

Lisa and Jessica, Friends in Adoption

A real adoption story. Adoptive mom Lisa and birthmother Jessica have something in common: David, their son. In this video, both women share their experiences through Open Adoption.

Weprin introduces Adoptee Bill of Rights

Recently, I read the following on my Facebook wall: “Assemblyman David Weprin introduced the adoptees bill of rights to give Adoptees access to their birth certificate and medical records at 18 on Sunday, November 13, 2011.” (Read the full article here) A comment was posted on my wall from a young person who was adopted: Lizzy: “Adopted or not…you should have access to … Read More

The Holidays Are Quickly Approaching, Books Are Welcomed Gifts

For young children and for friends and family to read to their children: Susan and Gordon Adopt a Baby illustrated by Joe Mathieu* Tell Me a Real Adoption Story by Betty Jean Lifton* For families to read to children where there is birth and adopted siblings: Sam’s Sister by Juliet C. Bond For families to read to children who have … Read More

FIA's Post Adoption Workshop A Huge Success

It was great to see everyone at FIA’s Post Adoption Workshop. Given your positive feedback we are looking forward to continuing these and will post a schedule for 2012 on the FIA website within the next few weeks. Continued feedback is appreciated at meredith@friendsinadoption.org.

A Fun Video: You Don't Have to go to Colorado…

An FIA alumni family …. happy day all Dawn

"My Name", by Liam Goaler

Dear Friends in Adoption, This was written by my 14-year-old nephew.  I thought it was pretty cool.   Great to speak with you as always. — Sue My Name My name Liam means “brave guardian” in English. My name is Irish, given from my birth parents. It is a different name, however it is common, like a camel with two humps. … Read More

Photos for your Birth Family

Here on the other side of your adoption journey you are no longer filled with anxiety and endless wait. Your time is filled with caring for your heart’s desire, the child that you so patiently, or not so patiently waited to come into your home. Now, the waiting has begun for your birth family. Their days may be filled with … Read More

Dave Thomas Foundation For Adoption Names America's 100 Best Adoption-Friendly Workplaces

The Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption announced the fifth annual 100 Best Adoption-Friendly Workplaces list recognizing organizations nationwide for their adoption benefits. The Wendy’s Company is No. 1 on this year’s list, with a combination of up to $24,300 in adoption assistance and up to six weeks of paid adoption leave.

The Life Changing Decisions in Adoption

Title: “The Life Changing Decisions in Adoption: Advice to Those Considering Adopting a Child” Author(s): Whitten, Kathleen.

Center For Family Connections ~ Evening Group Addition!

We invite you to join us for a six week group for those raising children with difficult beginnings. Specific topics include: Trauma, loss, attachment, parenting and child development. Sincerely, Center For Family Connections 350 Cambridge Street Cambridge, MA 02141 617-547-0909 cffc@kinnect.org

Dear Abby: "Issues of identity are serious matters for adoptees, families"

Dear Abby: May I weigh in on the letter from “Noah’s Real Dad in New York” (June 27), whose adult adopted son wants to reclaim his original last name? I am an adult adoptee who searched for and found my birth family. I also joined a support group that was formed to support the adoption triad. Research has shown that male … Read More

Sing Me Goodnight, by Lisa Redfern

A beautiful CD, Sing Me Goodnight by Lisa Redfern arrived at the agency yesterday. The staff LOVED it — 10 stars! Lisa dedicates the cd to “Parents and children, everywhere, especially those creating families through adoption.” This would make a great gift. Please check out: www.lisaredfern.com Lisa Redfern’s “Sing Me Goodnight” is a a deeply personal collection of tender lullabies … Read More

Adult Adoptees May Request Copies of Original Birth Certificates Beginning July 2012

Amendments to state law (R.I. Gen. Laws Sections 15-7, 23-3-1, 23-3-15) passed in July 2011 will allow Rhode Island-born adoptees age 25 and older to receive non-certified copies of their original, unaltered birth certificates from the State Office of Vital Records. (Non-certified copies of vital records are for informational purposes only and cannot be used for legal proof of identity, … Read More

Meeting heroes at the Friends in Adoption picnic

The annual picnic is a very powerful day and even more so this year.  Kids telling me about their years accomplishments, kids letting me know that they are coming to the FIA Provincetown picnic, too :-), kids coming up to me and inquiring about their birth families… One tween in particular who was placed with her mom and dad as … Read More

Birth certificates and the right to know

Should adoptees have access to birth parents or should birth parents’ anonymity be protected? The birth certificates of children who were given up for adoption have been locked up in metal filing cabinets in most states since the earlier part of this century—neither the adoptees, adopted parents, nor birth parents have access to them. Within the past few years, however, … Read More

Not the Mama Day

Dear Friend, Happy “Not the Mama” Day??  That’s the greeting my partner, Todd, and I give to each other every Father’s Day and Mother’s Day. (Not the mama being a tired joke from that old ABC show “Dinosaurs”) It too was meant as a joke, but it was also our reminder that we shouldn’t focus on our gender or whether … Read More

From Dawn's Desk: Aura and Molly, part 2

Some of you might have concerns regarding Molly meeting but then not speaking to her birth mother.  More and more of our alumni families and now our alumni kids who are of age (18) are calling FIA regarding connecting with the biological family.  It has been my observation that when these connections are made in the safety and security of … Read More

From Dawn’s Desk: Aura and Molly, part 1

My daughter Aura called me last night.  She asked if I had watched America’s Top Model because the runner up was adopted.  She was Aura’s favorite and spoke about her adoption.   Aura reflected:  “You know Mom when I was a teenager and I always felt disconnected and gave you and Pa a run for your money but always loving you … Read More

Professional Training in Adoption Ethics

Ethical Challenges in Adoption Practice In the complex world of adoption, some decisions are simple – many are not. For those who work at agencies, balancing personal values and agency policy or procedures is not always easy. For those who work independently, finding someone with whom to share concerns and get objective advice from can be tricky.

Should Adoption be a Reproductive Right?

Please visit the link below to read our Adoption Access Network co-founder, Cristina Page’s, most recent article on Huffington Post: “Should Adoption be a Reproductive Right?” http://www.huffingtonpost.com/cristina-page/should-adoption-be-a-repr_b_858404.html (Friends in Adoption is a proud member of the Adoption Access Network)    

FIA Review from Anne and Douglas, birth parents

“Our Case Manager was a pleasure to work with. For going through such a life-changing event and supporting us throughout our entire pregnant journey, she became like family. She was a friend to both of us, and our families. She made it possible to not only meet and befriend our adoptive parents, she made it possible to make them part … Read More

“Friending” Mother

When Wanda Audette’s adopted daughter was 15, she received a MySpace message out of the blue from her birth mother. The message included the woman’s phone number and home address, suggested they meet up, and advised the girl not to tell her parents. “She wanted to have a secret relationship,” says Audette…… Read More

Vermont adoption agencies pass love parent to parent

MIDDLETOWN SPRINGS — In 1979, Dawn Smith-Pliner and her partner, Joel, decided they wanted to adopt. But she says every agency they called said no, because they weren’t married, because they were of different religions, because of their income. “Not one person I called would even let us come to visit because we weren’t the template (family),” Smith-Pliner said.… Read More

Testimonial by a birth mother and birth father

“The day came when we finally got to speak with the couple we wanted. Everything went better than we could have hoped for. There were no awkward moments in conversation, nothing was forced, and we laughed throughout the whole thing.” —B and E, a birth mother and a birth father

Birth Mother Wing Yin’s review of Friends in Adoption

“My Case Manager helped me with everything that I asked, from sending me profiles of the adoptive parents that I had specifically told her, to getting me taken care of with my counselor that FIA had provided me to meet in person. I was nervous about meeting the adoptive parents but when I met them they were great. I actually … Read More

Birth mother Rebecca’s testimonial

“When I had my son, I wasn’t sure what to do. I didn’t find out I was pregnant until I was very far along in the pregnancy. I was already a single mom with a toddler at home. I had recently gotten sole custody of my daughter and was beginning to turn our lives around. I knew if I brought … Read More

Toni, a birth mother, and her testmonial

“I worked closely with the family I chose through my pregnancy, she went with me to most of my OBGYN appointments and was even in the delivery room with me when my daughter was born. My Case Manager made all of this possible and helped quickly and successfully work through any concerns or problems I or the adopting family had.” … Read More

Testimonial by a birth mother

“This experience was by far the hardest obstacle I’ve been through in my life. I can honestly say there was NO WAY I could have done it without my Case Manager. She was such an easy person to talk to. She always knew just what to say to make me smile or laugh. For two people who never knew each … Read More

FIA review by a birth father

“I met the family so I could ask questions and get to know them. You could tell from the very second that they were going to love my son more than anything and give him the world, which they do.” —M, a birth father

Review by Lisa, a birth mom

“I remember the excitement and relief when we were told that we could select the family that our baby would become a part of. When the envelope arrived with the adoptive family profiles in them, I vividly remember finding the profile of the family we wanted. They exuded such warmth in all of their pictures and you could instantly feel … Read More

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