“When I had my son, I wasn’t sure what to do. I didn’t find out I was pregnant until I was very far along in the pregnancy. I was already a single mom with a toddler at home. I had recently gotten sole custody of my daughter and was beginning to turn our lives around. I knew if I brought my son home, neither he nor my daughter would have the lives that I wanted them to have and that wouldn’t have been fair to either one of them.
After my son was born, I started thinking about adoption. I wanted him in a family that would raise him like I am raising my daughter and a family that would cherish every moment with him. I also wanted to know how he was doing as he grew up. While I knew that I couldn’t bring him home with me, it didn’t mean that I didn’t care or love him.
At the hospital, I talked with someone from Social Services. If I had put my son up for adoption through Social Services, I would not be able to meet the family that he would go to, he would have become a ward of the state and go to a foster family until the adoption became final, there would be no contact with my son or the adoptive family after the adoption took place. I couldn’t put my son in that situation.
After that, I talked with my doctor to see if she could help. She actually knew of Friends in Adoption. She was able to get me in contact with FIA and within a few hours I had talked with a Case Manager. After talking with her and being able to say this is what I want for my son, I felt empowered that I would be able to give him the life I wanted him to have. Any questions I had, even if they seemed silly, she was able to answer them and reassure me. She also set up the first meeting with the adoptive parents while I was still in the hospital.
My son’s adoptive parents are amazing. They are exactly the parents that I had been picturing in my head. I had no doubts or worries about them taking my son home. While the initial meeting was a little awkward, my son’s adoptive parents were very welcoming and made me feel like I was a part of their family. My son’s adoptive father told me that I gave their family life now, but I don’t think that they know that they did the same for my daughter and me. I can never thank them enough for that. While I think about my son every day, I have never once worried about him.
While I was at the hospital working with FIA, the best part about it was that my son was able to leave the hospital with his adoptive family the day that I was released. I made my first phone call to FIA on a Thursday around noon and my son went home with his family on Friday. FIA was able to make everything happen and give my family and my son’s adoptive family both new lives. I can’t thank everyone that works with Friends in Adoption enough for the support that they provided and making this happen.”
—Rebecca, a birth mother